Post 199 finds me still struggling. Sleep is better, but not great. Training is mostly non-existent. Eating is just plain terrible. And I'm not really having fun with any of it. The mojo continues to hide.
I don't know exactly why, but I do know I must do even more to stop this train before I go so far off course I can't get back. So here's the plan:
Take a HUGE step back and return to my early WW days, which means keep things simple. I'm going to re-teach myself to eat and journal, using my old paper journals which I used to love to fill out. No computer logs, for food or exercise. No "training" per se. Just get back to the body movement than I love, and whichs helps me feel like I'm taking good care of my body. That means swimming and yoga, as primary. Running/walking and cycling will be secondary.
I don't know what that means for my season -- but the season is moot anyway if I'm not training, getting fatter and unfit, and feeling guilty about it. I also feel like I'm spending more time on the computer than I should (even if I'm not providing evidence thereto), so I'm taking a break from the blog, my WWFC-Triers group, and my tri-drs list-serv, as well. You have all been WONDERFUL, AMAZING, GRACEFUL support, but it is the break from sitting on my backside reading, surfing, and NOT moving that I need. It is only temporary -- believe me, when I feel like I'm making progress again, and I am succeeding at re-re-training myself to good habits, I will be BACK.
See ya on the flippy, as they say :-)